The Red Flags of Cyberlove

Posted by Erin


It's another installment of "Lessons from the Online Dating Front." That's right, real life stories again from the good, the bad, and the OMG what were they thinking!? As an on-again, off-again online dater, I can't tell you how many silly situations I've experienced and crazy stories I've heard. My friends and I? We couldn't make this stuff up!

It's true, according to SafeInternetDating.com, the Internet has become the hot new place for smart, eligible people to find romance, and those looking for love are swarming into cyberspace. As a result, many individuals are beginning relationships online with people they have not met and know little about. It made me wonder, does traversing the digital dating frontier change the dating game and if so, what are the new red flags?

As I listen to friends and research "how to play it safe on the online dating front" these 4 red flags stand out:

Red Flag #1: Someone who seems too good to be true. Misrepresentation and lying about age, appearance, income, or anything else is immoral and worse than that, illegal, because the profile could be fraud or phishing. The fact is, lying about age and marital status runs rampant on the Internet and don't think it's just the guys ladies; women are some of the biggest perpetrators of misrepresentation.

Red Flag #2: Someone who is evasive. They won't answer straight questions like are you married, how old are you, or they won't send you a picture. Tread with caution.

Red Flag #3: Someone who won't meet you in real life, or even talk on the phone, instead they only want to communicate digitally. Clearly this person is physically unavailable to carry on a relationship, and possibly emotionally unavailable at that particular time too. The fact is, many people are not serious about meeting someone online, they are "trying it on" only to see "what's out there."

Red Flag #4: Someone who wants to rush into everything, or move at a speed you're not comfortable with. "The bottom line is it doesn't matter one bit how many responses you get - how many of them are good, bad, or OMG - it only takes one person to make it all worthwhile." And even in real life --if you get passed the red flags-- it can still take time.
AML,
Erin